It Can Happen...

I recently was sent an article by my Godsister about a very touchy subject. Especially in the religious community and now I am sharing... Because that's what I do, I share ( I know I know... Your Welcome).

So As per the title of the post. The article was entitled IT HAPPENED TO ME: I Waited Until My Wedding Night to Lose My Virginity and I Wish I Hadn't Catchy title right? (^^^ also a link that will lead you to the article... convenience with you in mind).

The article discussed a woman who decided to wait until she was married to lose her virginity by having sex. I don't want to spoil the article for you but in order for me to discuss it I have to...So I shall pause so you can either A] Click the link above and read the article (or scan through it at least) or B] decide that you don't care to read the article and continue reading....... I'll Wait

....PAUSE....

Okay so anyway in the article that you either read or not, the author was a religious 10 year old and decided that she was going to remain pure until her marriage. As the article goes on, she remains true to her pledge and when she got married, of course she consummated her marriage. But she was ashamed after having sex, to the point that she didn't even want her husband to touch her. She ended her article by summing up and saying she wishes that she did not wait until marriage and religion has no right "controlling" females by way of sexuality. 

Now I have a few things to say about this. First: I can understand what she was saying about being young when she took the pledge to save herself for marriage. That is a big decision to make and I don't think that children should be presented with a decision like that until they are aware of what they are saying. Especially at the age of ten. We all do and say things when we are young  because of friends, family, or just wanting to be included. Secondly: when this woman came into "womanhood" remaining a virgin became her life. She used that as a tool of being the center of attention. She was placed on a pedestal because she was set a part from the crowd. She was her title in a sense. Correct me if I'm wrong but when you take a pledge like that you are suppose to focus your attention on Christ and not yourself. And this may have helped her outcome. At least that what I choose to believe. 

Lastly, when she got married, the moment she had been waiting for happened. She lost her virginity. She describes feeling ashamed, dirty, and less than (if you will). She was admired and in center focus because here she was a virgin and now she wasn't. She lost the one thing that everyone knew her for. Now the main problem I have with this is that in all of this she decided to keep her feelings to herself. She felt as though she was to please her husband(mainly sexually) even though she was feeling low. I believe that when you remain pure until the night of your wedding you need to tell your husband the deal. He needs to know that this is new to you so he can cater to your needs and make the experience as (for lack of a better word) pleasurable as possible. But this woman failed to do so. She let her insecurities create this false idea that remaining sexually pure until marriage is nothing more than a way to control women, when really it was her lack of communication and false beliefs of judgement spark those thoughts. I don't believe that sexual purity is a way of control because women have free will just like men do. Ultimately sexual purity isn't about external people controlling you it's about you controlling yourself. That's what this author failed to understand. As Christians we are called to follow the teachings of Christ. God wants us to understand that sex is a big deal. It comes with baggage, soul connections, and even rewards (in its correct context of marriage). So being sexually pure isn't a bad thing, its protective in a sense..

All in all I said all that to say, don't make decisions for the wrong reasons and don't do things for the wrong reasons as well. Decisions like that require disciple, constant communication (with Christ and your spouse), as well as just patience. If you decide to make a decision such as that, research what you need to be doing with your time, because its not ALL about you ultimately. 

What did you think of the article?  Let me know !